We are shown the Lilies (and all of God's beauty), and told how God takes care of them so well. What can we do to deserve such care. I think God is calling me to do more trusting and less manipulating.
2 steps have lead me to open up my blog account for the first time since 2013 (password still remembered on phone luckily). The first I finished editing my paper on following God's will vs my own with my dad earlier tonight. The second was a fire alarm with a girl in a blanket.
The first was not unusual. My dad edits most of my papers, and grab school hasn't let him off the hook. I got a few good points from his as we worked through it. Always happy to make my dad proud. But the paper unfolded as me vs God in a way where we are fighting to do what's best. I believe I am outmatched. But I can't seem to give up control. I need things my way, even if I'm trying to aim them at God.
Then I'm getting a good nights sleep in a hotel before my flight to grad school residency in arizona. The friend I am flying with parents decided to stay in Detroit instead ok having to drive in the morning. During the night something set off the antifire smoke stuff and then yeah, alarms, lights, fire trucks, and even some cop cars. While walking around pretending I could be of help I notice a couple girls that didn't talk their to put on their winter coats. I hadn't noticed the cold until 2 minutes after I didn't give up my coat. I thought about it, but there were 2 of them, they were girls and I didn't want to seem in appropriate, and I was just in a cut off... But from that time on I couldn't stop shivering. My brain tells me its from the cold finally reaching through my light jacket. But I think this is me failing yet again to walk through a threshold God is calling me to.
God forgive me, and continue to call me. May I be your servant and not my own servant.
