So God threw me a few curve balls this week. I just got in a rhythm of team after team coming and going. But then Michigan and Virginia happened. Two great teams, very different but very ready to be used by God, and I loved it. So there went the keeping myself for a week. But this week I have a week off, so take a rest heart you need it. Especially the first 3 things I saw on facebook were 2 friends now in relationships, and then an awesome couple got married, and I'm still in Atlanta.
While I'm on the heartbreak issue. My heart broke for my home church this last week. Not completely sure of all that is going on, but my minister and friend might not be there when I return home in a few weeks. I love him very much, and have enjoyed the time of ministry and learning from him. I pray that God is leading my church through this struggle, and wish more than any of the other reasons I could be home.
My parents are visiting, and it was fun to see them at church this morning. This church loves every person who walks through the doors. You can not escape being hugged by atleast 30 people. And just seeing them interact made my heart feel better. Realizing what God has used me for this summer, and building the relationships I have with the folks here. I'm gonna miss them very much. But got 2 weeks left before I need to say goodbye, so I won't worry about that till later.
Post-Offices are closed on Saturday. Just letting you know in case you have 5 packages to mail, and show up on a Saturday.
I need to start my travel plans for before school starts. So if you want to claim some time between August 9th and Aug 30th let me know so I can put it on my schedule. Literally, first come basis :).
One last thing as I work to make my paragraphs smaller. I just made the last payment on my car. So my 2003 Hyundai Elantra GT is completely mine :)
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Monday, July 19, 2010
Howdy
Sorry for those who know what I mean by when I say howdy, but you'll just have to ask about that.
So this week is looking interesting. But first a recap of the stuff from last week. I've really come to grasp with the idea that these groups that come and go are my friends. It's only a week so it's not deep friendships, but still I will defend them, and love them as much as I can.
I had an incident at my park, but can't talk about it, for protection of a minor, but it's pretty crazy. I want to talk about it, but anyone who has worked with youth can understand that it's not a good idea to post something like that on your blog.
I liked seeing the kids last week grow. There were a few that I kinda latched onto, and made help more than others. Almost to the point of being unfair, but also to the point of growing them in a servant role. Some kids flourished and really grew, and other complained about all the extra work. Thanks for those of you who helped out more. I am sad I haven't kept up with some of the kids that I have left more. It's just been so busy, I haven't even kept up with some friends form back home. I love the kids, but miss my friends. it's a hard thing to do when you only get a little time on the internet, or with my phone. Skyping is always the recommended form of communication, or a phone call.
But this week is different. The kids with me at the park are really organized and great. I literally just watched them work as if I were a kid myself. THe walking is fun too. The people on the roads are recognizing me more now, and they stop and chat with me while I walk to get the kids. I love my job. But we taught the kids this week the blowdart game, and they love it. I'm having fun, and really enjoying getting to know them better. Looking forward to work the next day is a hug blessing God has granted me with this summer.
I look forward to my parents coming next weekend, I long to see a familiar face. So if anybody wants to come visit, I have a spare bedroom, and all the food you would want. I even have a week off starting Friday through the next Sunday...
So this week is looking interesting. But first a recap of the stuff from last week. I've really come to grasp with the idea that these groups that come and go are my friends. It's only a week so it's not deep friendships, but still I will defend them, and love them as much as I can.
I had an incident at my park, but can't talk about it, for protection of a minor, but it's pretty crazy. I want to talk about it, but anyone who has worked with youth can understand that it's not a good idea to post something like that on your blog.
I liked seeing the kids last week grow. There were a few that I kinda latched onto, and made help more than others. Almost to the point of being unfair, but also to the point of growing them in a servant role. Some kids flourished and really grew, and other complained about all the extra work. Thanks for those of you who helped out more. I am sad I haven't kept up with some of the kids that I have left more. It's just been so busy, I haven't even kept up with some friends form back home. I love the kids, but miss my friends. it's a hard thing to do when you only get a little time on the internet, or with my phone. Skyping is always the recommended form of communication, or a phone call.
But this week is different. The kids with me at the park are really organized and great. I literally just watched them work as if I were a kid myself. THe walking is fun too. The people on the roads are recognizing me more now, and they stop and chat with me while I walk to get the kids. I love my job. But we taught the kids this week the blowdart game, and they love it. I'm having fun, and really enjoying getting to know them better. Looking forward to work the next day is a hug blessing God has granted me with this summer.
I look forward to my parents coming next weekend, I long to see a familiar face. So if anybody wants to come visit, I have a spare bedroom, and all the food you would want. I even have a week off starting Friday through the next Sunday...
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Different pace
For those of you who my dad has talked into reading my blog, this probably isn't one he meant. The kids are great, I talked with a pimp, met an amazing 88 year old lady while feeding the homeless, and I'm starting to love the church here more and more but realizing my time is coming to an end soon.
This blog is a tug of war. But with some Bible lingo. My dilemma is that at times in life I feel like Job. Where I am being treated badly to test my faith, and see how God wants me to live, and then learn from that and move on. Or am I the Israelites in Jeremiah, where it is because of How the Isrealites were turning away from God and seeking after their own dreams and not putting God first. It's just a small thought for the day, and not sure how much I can look into things. I have just been going through some hindrances lately, and not sure whether to look for God in them, or to try and find the reasons that things are going bad, and where I am falling away from God.
This blog is a tug of war. But with some Bible lingo. My dilemma is that at times in life I feel like Job. Where I am being treated badly to test my faith, and see how God wants me to live, and then learn from that and move on. Or am I the Israelites in Jeremiah, where it is because of How the Isrealites were turning away from God and seeking after their own dreams and not putting God first. It's just a small thought for the day, and not sure how much I can look into things. I have just been going through some hindrances lately, and not sure whether to look for God in them, or to try and find the reasons that things are going bad, and where I am falling away from God.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
How Great is Our God
This week was different. With the holiday the group was only here 3 days. But we still got the Six Flags invite :) The group had a married couple help be the leaders. Early in the week they showed they had a heart for others, and continued with it throughout the week. She made my park ministry a breeze, and the group helped me take some giant steps towards building relationships with those kids. I did find out one of the young boys moved out of the area. He was a great kid, but had some “hood” problems. He was always trying to fight for any reason, but when I was able to calm him down, he was very intelligent, and even was apologetic for loosing his cool. But I have a group of kids that are a handful, but I feel God is giving me the guidance, strength, and mission teams to be able to reach. I’m looking forward to next week.
The group brought grapes and apples for the snack on Thursday. The kids loved it, which is a ton different then kids back in Huntington.
I have been challenged to get outside my comfort zone. The women of the married couple was staying up late on Thursday night and talking with 2 other ladies outside the church. They were discussing the prostitute house across the street (which is the one 3 doors down from my house). I was nervous just being outside, but she had such a heart for the people that she even struck up a conversation with the pimp of the house Friday morning during breakfast. To me that was crazy. Another side story is from Shaun. Shaun and I are similar but different. During a trip to some low income areas to give out hotdogs and chips, Shaun asked me if I wanted to head over to the shady house with him. I knew which one he was talking about. 3 guys, and 2 girls were outside of a house across the street. They all looked suspicious, and after being with one of the kids last week and him being offered weed, I wasn’t that excited to branch out. But I went in with him. WE just walked up and humbly invited them over for a hotdog. While we were there another guy walked out from around back and kinda scared me. The reason I say these stories is these 2 people a challenging me. They are both great people, but I see in them something I envy. The ability to put my paranoia about my own safety aside, and do the work that God would have me do.
A new boy showed up at my park this week, and the teams intern and him got into a discussion fairly quick. The boy seemed to have some scar markings on his arm, and be a little mentally handicapped. One of my SA contacts was there and we walked the boy home, just to see what his home life is, and meet someone, and talk to them about kids club, and inform them about the salvation army. I am hopping this leads to another kid that God will allow me the privilege of ministering to on his behalf.
The group this week was great. They have a heart for the hurting. I had to tell them several times, and I need to let the previous groups know, that I cannot pick a favorite, or say one group was better than the others. Just God is using them all differently, and they are all amazing youth, and amazing leaders that will hopefully continue working for and searching after God.
But again it was hard to say goodbye. I’m trying to let a few things go a little more, in order to hurt less. Not sure how my heart can take it. Love God with all my heart, mind, and strength. Then love others as myself.
The group brought grapes and apples for the snack on Thursday. The kids loved it, which is a ton different then kids back in Huntington.
I have been challenged to get outside my comfort zone. The women of the married couple was staying up late on Thursday night and talking with 2 other ladies outside the church. They were discussing the prostitute house across the street (which is the one 3 doors down from my house). I was nervous just being outside, but she had such a heart for the people that she even struck up a conversation with the pimp of the house Friday morning during breakfast. To me that was crazy. Another side story is from Shaun. Shaun and I are similar but different. During a trip to some low income areas to give out hotdogs and chips, Shaun asked me if I wanted to head over to the shady house with him. I knew which one he was talking about. 3 guys, and 2 girls were outside of a house across the street. They all looked suspicious, and after being with one of the kids last week and him being offered weed, I wasn’t that excited to branch out. But I went in with him. WE just walked up and humbly invited them over for a hotdog. While we were there another guy walked out from around back and kinda scared me. The reason I say these stories is these 2 people a challenging me. They are both great people, but I see in them something I envy. The ability to put my paranoia about my own safety aside, and do the work that God would have me do.
A new boy showed up at my park this week, and the teams intern and him got into a discussion fairly quick. The boy seemed to have some scar markings on his arm, and be a little mentally handicapped. One of my SA contacts was there and we walked the boy home, just to see what his home life is, and meet someone, and talk to them about kids club, and inform them about the salvation army. I am hopping this leads to another kid that God will allow me the privilege of ministering to on his behalf.
The group this week was great. They have a heart for the hurting. I had to tell them several times, and I need to let the previous groups know, that I cannot pick a favorite, or say one group was better than the others. Just God is using them all differently, and they are all amazing youth, and amazing leaders that will hopefully continue working for and searching after God.
But again it was hard to say goodbye. I’m trying to let a few things go a little more, in order to hurt less. Not sure how my heart can take it. Love God with all my heart, mind, and strength. Then love others as myself.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Best at my job, best job, safety, crying...
I've been a little busy. So here are some tidbits from my mind I wrote down during this last week (in no particular order).
Give it you best but leave some for tomorrow. This has to do with my job that seems 24 hours a day. I'm with amazing high school kids that are on a mission trip, and growing from it. But if I spend all 24 hours a day every day will I get burned out? I hope not. I'm hoping God gives me the strength to get through it, and the knowledge of when to take a break. There is a girls basketball team that comes in to practice at 5 am each day. I heard the coach telling them to give 110%. But does that mean at a game after the 4th quarter should they keep playing? Side joke to the side now, I am hoping I can do what I am doing as though I am working for the Lord. But day in and day out might be a struggle, but for now I am gonna stick to the plan. I was even really glad when at like midnight me and 2 guys got to have a pretty in depth conversation about some theological things. It was pretty awesome to see God at least on these boys' minds. And if I wasn't giving it my best then I would have missed this opportunity to share with them, and help them grow deeper in God. Which by the way, please if you do nothing else try and grow closer to God, it is amazing, and if you get the chance to help someone else too DO IT.
Best job ever. Not a great transition, but related though. My main focus at my job is leading the teams through their mission trip. This means they want a good experience, and I try and give it to them. But I also keep close to that the community that we are helping. The goal is not just have them come just to be on e mission trip and feel better, but to actually help in the community, so I get to put the 2 groups together in the best way possible. Then my team and I fit together to organize the team the best we can, and we strive to make all of these puzzle piece work together in a way that glorifies God. But to sum this up; I get to work with great youth, great youth leaders that I can learn from, I get to minister to a community and build awesome relationships, and I get to live with 3 amazing friends that have a desire for this summer to be the best it could ever be.
Safety at park. I know I am working in inner city Atlanta, so this should not be a surprise. But I had a group of high school boys show up when I was trying to lead my kids club. They didn't do much, but they did hit each other and a girl that was with them a few times, and I tried to step in, and talk with them. But it didn't go so well. As I was leaving they were throwing some stuff at me and one of the boys I was walking with. But even the boy wanted to go back and talk and try and be friends with these guys so he could be more like them. It kills me to see some of these kids act like this. One boy was gonna hit another and when I got him calm he started talking and I could see how smart he is, but it takes so little for them to get angry, and the way they express their anger is by hitting or punching or anything of the sort. I'm a long way from the Sparks program back in Huntington...
Incredible cry just let go. This is last, and comes from a talk I had with a lady from the Salvation Army I work with. I am not sure why but I poured a lot of personal stuff out to her. I mentioned how I have been saying goodbye a lot, and part of this job is getting to know amazing kids just in time to say bye. Then we talked about some other things, but she just told me it sounds like I just need a good cry. I kinda agree, but not sure how to go about it. I like being in control, and I'm hoping God allows me to break down and trust Him more, because if I stay like this I will just try and stay in control and not allow Him to lead. But any time I get a little teary eyed I get control of my emotions and just do the eye itch thing and move on. Not sure where this came from but it seems to be pretty deep, because I can't really remember the last time I really cried hard. So if you see my in a corner crying just let me be, so I can finish this good cry. Not sure which reason will set me off, but I hope its soon.
Give it you best but leave some for tomorrow. This has to do with my job that seems 24 hours a day. I'm with amazing high school kids that are on a mission trip, and growing from it. But if I spend all 24 hours a day every day will I get burned out? I hope not. I'm hoping God gives me the strength to get through it, and the knowledge of when to take a break. There is a girls basketball team that comes in to practice at 5 am each day. I heard the coach telling them to give 110%. But does that mean at a game after the 4th quarter should they keep playing? Side joke to the side now, I am hoping I can do what I am doing as though I am working for the Lord. But day in and day out might be a struggle, but for now I am gonna stick to the plan. I was even really glad when at like midnight me and 2 guys got to have a pretty in depth conversation about some theological things. It was pretty awesome to see God at least on these boys' minds. And if I wasn't giving it my best then I would have missed this opportunity to share with them, and help them grow deeper in God. Which by the way, please if you do nothing else try and grow closer to God, it is amazing, and if you get the chance to help someone else too DO IT.
Best job ever. Not a great transition, but related though. My main focus at my job is leading the teams through their mission trip. This means they want a good experience, and I try and give it to them. But I also keep close to that the community that we are helping. The goal is not just have them come just to be on e mission trip and feel better, but to actually help in the community, so I get to put the 2 groups together in the best way possible. Then my team and I fit together to organize the team the best we can, and we strive to make all of these puzzle piece work together in a way that glorifies God. But to sum this up; I get to work with great youth, great youth leaders that I can learn from, I get to minister to a community and build awesome relationships, and I get to live with 3 amazing friends that have a desire for this summer to be the best it could ever be.
Safety at park. I know I am working in inner city Atlanta, so this should not be a surprise. But I had a group of high school boys show up when I was trying to lead my kids club. They didn't do much, but they did hit each other and a girl that was with them a few times, and I tried to step in, and talk with them. But it didn't go so well. As I was leaving they were throwing some stuff at me and one of the boys I was walking with. But even the boy wanted to go back and talk and try and be friends with these guys so he could be more like them. It kills me to see some of these kids act like this. One boy was gonna hit another and when I got him calm he started talking and I could see how smart he is, but it takes so little for them to get angry, and the way they express their anger is by hitting or punching or anything of the sort. I'm a long way from the Sparks program back in Huntington...
Incredible cry just let go. This is last, and comes from a talk I had with a lady from the Salvation Army I work with. I am not sure why but I poured a lot of personal stuff out to her. I mentioned how I have been saying goodbye a lot, and part of this job is getting to know amazing kids just in time to say bye. Then we talked about some other things, but she just told me it sounds like I just need a good cry. I kinda agree, but not sure how to go about it. I like being in control, and I'm hoping God allows me to break down and trust Him more, because if I stay like this I will just try and stay in control and not allow Him to lead. But any time I get a little teary eyed I get control of my emotions and just do the eye itch thing and move on. Not sure where this came from but it seems to be pretty deep, because I can't really remember the last time I really cried hard. So if you see my in a corner crying just let me be, so I can finish this good cry. Not sure which reason will set me off, but I hope its soon.
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